Filed under adult children

Why Hospitals Scare the Adult Children of Older Elders

After I my recent post on hospital induced delirium, people begin chatting with me, unsolicited, about their elderly parents’ hospital experiences. Admitting an aging parent to a hospital appears to instill significant anxiety and resignation in adult children. The spontaneous conversations usually focused on the ways that hospitals, despite commitment to good medical practices, cheerful … Continue reading

Older Elders and the End of Life

If you are an adult child with ninetysomething parents, you are probably familiar with the drill. Like me you may receive phone calls from an elderly parent a couple of times each week, usually asking a question, describing a problem, or just expressing anxiety. Or you may hear from caregivers about a problem — a … Continue reading

More on Fraudulent Phone Calls and Scams

I do not think a week goes by when one of my elderly parents doesn’t mention a strange phone call. They are always disconcerting and often scary, and older adult are prime targets. An excellent article, Die, Robocalls, Die: A How-to Guide to Stop Spammers and Extract Revenge, appeared this week in the Washington Post. The … Continue reading

Older Elders, Adult Children & THE CAR

At what point do you encourage or insist that parents in their late 80s and early 90s stop driving? Every adult child speaks quietly and with angst about this aging parent car conundrum. Almost no one is satisfied with the end result. It seems to be a painful, no-win dilemma in just about every family. More … Continue reading

I Knew I Was Right to Dispose of Those Powerful Pain Killers

Recently memories about whether or not to use pain medications came flooding back after reading a New York Times article Alternatives to Opioids for Pain Relief. The article described research that compares the effectiveness of opioid and non-opioid medicines. It made me remember just how easily power pain medications have been prescribed. Physicians observed and … Continue reading

Prepare Elderly Parents for Their New Medicare Cards

If you are an individual who focuses on personal data security, one of the most surprising things you discover when it’s time to offer support to aging parents is that  Social Security numbers appear right on the front of the Medicare card. Americans are told not to carry their Social Security cards around, but once they … Continue reading

You Can’t Parent Your Parent — No Matter What

I just read a touching 2013 column about supporting elderly parents, written by Washington Post columnist, Cortland Milloy. In his column Milloy addresses the notion, so prevalent these days, that many of us are “parenting our parents.” I’ll let you read the column for yourself, but I have some firm issues when it comes to … Continue reading

Fraud, Investments, and Our Elder Parents

Check out “Why Older People are Vulnerable to Fraud & How to Protect Them, a February 2017 New York Times article that describes the ways older adults are susceptible to fraudulent phone calls and offers, especially when it concerns investments. It also  makes suggestions about what people who get entangled in these offers can do. The … Continue reading

Giving vs. Receiving: Growing Older & Extreme Frustration

Change is constant when we age, and it’s important for adult children occasionally to consider the changes in our elder parents’ lives by looking through the prisms that our parents gaze through and thoughtfully examining their perspectives. In a conversation with my mom — who has found herself less energetic and more dependent on others — she shared her journal … Continue reading

The Anatomy of a Fall — Mine

In April 2016 the health writer Jane Brody wrote a powerful essay in the New York Times Personal Health column, Thriving at Age 70 and Beyond. She described the importance of focusing, as we age, on a healthy life style and maintaining social relationships as well as adjusting to age-related physical changes that occur. Brody specifically … Continue reading

Stop Saying These Three Things to Elder Adults!

When they speak to elderly seniors, middle-age children and and other adults tend to say things, often unintentionally, that demonstrate a lack of respect and empathy. Sometimes it happens when a person tries to solve a problem quickly; at others the goal is to move along getting to work or school on time. Not infrequently adult children … Continue reading