Caregiving in the Time of CoVid-19, #13: It’s a Time of Melancholy If Parents Are in Long Term Care…

I’m so appreciative of the way the assisted living community where my parents now live went into action quickly. Right after the problems in the care community in Washington state, my parents’ little village closed to visitors and set up dining services that emphasize social distance. I know VMRC is doing everything possible to protect my parents. Yet it is a time of sadness.

River rainbowYet in my most dispirited moments, I’ve started to wonder if I’ll ever see one or the other of them again. My parents, as well protected as they are, really do not understand what is happening — or they forget each time they are told. At 92 and 96, they are fragile. Subtracting CoVid-19 from the equation, either could pass on at any time and for the next two months — at least — I won’t be there.

And so I call every day. I remind them why I cannot see them and why they cannot see me. I note that my husband and I are also in the age group that needs to take extra care during this pandemic.

There are many of us out there, experiencing these same caregiving anxieties during this time of social distancing. Almost every day I speak with friends and acquaintances whose parents are in the same situation. Like me, each is thinking and worrying. When we adult children consider our separation are all gazing through the same strange prism of melancholy.

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