For the past several weeks, Mother’s breathing has grown shallower and faster, and she can’t catch her breath. I am told this is called “air hunger.” Her heart is racing, and it is difficult for her to rest lying down. Mother uses oxygen continuously, and she continues to be severely disoriented. So today hospice arranged … Continue reading
Filed under senior parents …
How My Parents Selected a Retirement Community
My parents have moved through three or four retirement periods. At any given time, it seemed like one of them had a retirement job of some type, and my father, until a couple of years ago, accepted regular “fill-in” church assignments, helping out a church for a week or two here and there. They have … Continue reading
Late State Dementia: Concentration
By the time a person reaches late stage dementia, concentration disappears. Mother’s ability to concentrate is mostly gone. A fleeting memory, a song listened to, a story read, a much enjoyed TV news show broadcast — not one of these activities can be completed. We can start any of them and for a minute the … Continue reading
Senior Citizens and End-of-Year Giving
Help aging parents be excited about technology and to use it, but also counsel them to be skeptical, savvy, and ask questions. It is the time of year when many scammers make telephone calls or send e-mails asking for contributions to charity. I have a rule. Unless it is my college or one of the … Continue reading
Communicating: Respect No Matter What the State-of-Mind
I’ve noticed that people at Mother’s assisted living facility, as well as many of the other people who see her daily, are respectful of her limited communication skills and try to work around her dementia disorientation. At her assisted living facility staff members always take a few moments after they enter the apartment, addressing her … Continue reading
Parent Legacies: Modeling Philanthropy
Charitable giving has always been important in my family.The time and energy that my parents, now in their mid-80’s and starting their 61st year of marriage, spent on service to others has, I believe, has contributed not only to their rich lives, but also to their good health. I cannot remember a time when I … Continue reading
ADL’s and IADL’s: What’s the Difference?
Links to other postings about ADL’s are at the bottom. In an earlier post I was not as accurate as I should have been about activities of daily living. The functional tasks in the daily lives of older seniors are divided into two parts, activities of daily living (ADL’s) and instrumental activities of daily living (IADL’s).
Dementia: Caregivers
Committed caregivers make the dementia experience tolerable, and tolerable is about the best we can feel as we live through this terrible disease. My husband and I are caregivers to his mother, but we also have strong, warm, and compassionate caregivers who spend much of the day with her. These women are making our experience … Continue reading
Dementia: Mobility, Falling, and Perception
This morning mother fell. Until now she has stayed in bed until one of the nursing assistants arrives to help her get up and get dressed. Today it was a different story — for the first time she tried to get out of bed. The nursing assistant found mother on the floor in the living room a bit … Continue reading
Seniors: Avoid Online Fraud
All of us, no matter what our ages, need to take care when we buy things online. There is so much to learn about the online world, and deceptive or fraudulent practices take advantage of any gap in our knowledge. When you read the rest of this post about deceptive practices related to online purchasing, … Continue reading
Senior Medicare Patients Return to the Hospital After Discharge
HEALTH in NY TIMES | December 08, 2009 Groups Try Simple Steps to Avoid Hospital Rebound By THE ASSOCIATED PRESS WASHINGTON (AP) — Talk about unnecessary misery: One in five Medicare patients winds up back in the hospital within a month — even worse, one in four patients with heart failure. Read more @ … Continue reading
Getting Started With Hospice
Our family member with dementia is now in a hospice program. She continues to live in her apartment and to be helped by the caregivers that she is used to having as a part of her daily life. Mother was clear that she did not want to go back to the hospital for any reason … Continue reading
Assumptions About Being Old
Too often seniors who have been successful and productive individuals, are trivialized in their everyday interactions. Most often this occurs unintentionally because of unconscious assumptions about people who are growing old. But it occurs everywhere, and I believe the assumptions that greet a person of any age can often evolve into self-fulfilling prophecies. Negative assumptions … Continue reading
Dementia: Loss of Mobility
We see it coming — mother’s loss of mobility. At first she took smaller and smaller steps. Gradually those steps turned into larger shuffling steps. We bought her a cane, but she did not have the focus to understand how to use it. Little by little the big shuffles turned into tiny ones. She has … Continue reading
Keeping Our Parents and Ourselves Accident Free
Thanksgiving and Dementia — Redux
Our family member with dementia arrived at our Thanksgiving celebration sometime around 2:00 in the afternoon. Her afternoon caretaker took Thanksgiving afternoon off, and we planned to be responsible for her care until bedtime. Things went quite well, however, we now realize that if we are entertaining family and hosting festivities at our house, we … Continue reading
Scary or Urgent E-mail — Don’t Be Fooled
E-mail is the best communication tool for seniors, kids, and grandchildren and is so easy and convenient! This interconnectedness is even more important at times of family illness and when family members live far away from one another. All family members, but especially seniors, need to master some important skills and understand some key concepts, … Continue reading
Senior Adults and Falling
From the November 11, 2009 New York Times in an article by Steve Lohr … “FALLS are so harmful to the elderly and so costly to society that if falling were a disease it be deemed an epidemic.” Almost every week or so an over 70-year-old acquaintance or friend falls. According to the Centers for … Continue reading
Holidays
With three senior parents I am thinking a lot about holidays — past and future — how wonderful they can be and how to celebrate without a lot of brouhaha. I am concentrating on making each holiday, in this case Thanksgiving, special but also as simple as possible. This year we’ve navigated lots of health … Continue reading
Stages of Dementia, Part II
Keep in mind that these stages are general guidelines that help people understand dementia’s progression, and that some professionals do not use them as disease guideposts. I am applying them to the dementia that is occurring in my family. Another family may not have anywhere near the same experience. By the time stage five of … Continue reading
As Our Parents Age So Do We 