Tagged with senior parents …

After Death Details, Part I: Grief

Grief … It has been a week since my husband’s mother died. We miss her, though we are glad she is not in the extreme discomfort that she experienced at the end. We’ve laughed and we’ve cried, more of the former, because she lived a long and rich life. Saying goodbye takes time. Photograph albums … Continue reading →

How My Parents Selected a Retirement Community

My parents have moved through three or four retirement periods. At any given time, it seemed like one of them had a retirement job of some type, and my father, until a couple of years ago, accepted regular “fill-in” church assignments, helping out a church for a week or two here and there. They have … Continue reading →

Senior Citizens and End-of-Year Giving

Help aging parents be excited about technology and to use it, but also counsel them to be skeptical, savvy, and ask questions. It is the time of year when many scammers make telephone calls or send e-mails asking for contributions to charity. I have a rule. Unless it is my college or one of the … Continue reading →

Parent Legacies: Modeling Philanthropy

Charitable giving has always been important in my family.The time and energy that my parents, now in their mid-80’s and starting their 61st year of marriage, spent on service to others has, I believe, has contributed not only to their rich lives, but also to their good health. I cannot remember a time when I … Continue reading →

Assumptions About Being Old

Too often seniors who have been successful and productive individuals, are trivialized in their everyday interactions. Most often this occurs unintentionally because of unconscious assumptions about people who are growing old. But it occurs everywhere, and I believe the assumptions that greet a person of any age can often evolve into self-fulfilling prophecies. Negative assumptions … Continue reading →

Dementia: Loss of Mobility

We see it coming — mother’s loss of mobility. At first she took smaller and smaller steps. Gradually those steps turned into larger shuffling steps. We bought her a cane, but she did not have the focus to understand how to use it. Little by little the big shuffles turned into tiny ones. She has … Continue reading →

Thanksgiving and Dementia — Redux

Our family member with dementia arrived at our Thanksgiving celebration sometime around 2:00 in the afternoon.  Her afternoon caretaker  took Thanksgiving afternoon off, and we planned to be responsible for her care until bedtime.  Things went quite well, however, we now realize that if we are entertaining family and hosting festivities at our house, we … Continue reading →

Scary or Urgent E-mail — Don’t Be Fooled

E-mail  is the best communication tool for seniors, kids, and grandchildren and is so easy and convenient!  This interconnectedness is even more important at times of family illness and when family members live far away from one another.  All family members, but especially seniors, need to master some important skills and understand some key concepts, … Continue reading →

Senior Adults and Falling

From the November 11, 2009  New York Times in an article by Steve Lohr … “FALLS are so harmful to the elderly and so costly to society that if falling were a disease it  be deemed an epidemic.” Almost every week or so an over 70-year-old acquaintance or friend falls. According to the Centers for … Continue reading →

Holidays

With three senior parents I am thinking a lot about holidays — past and future — how wonderful they can be and how to celebrate without a lot of brouhaha.  I am concentrating on making each holiday, in this case Thanksgiving, special but also as simple as possible.  This year we’ve navigated lots of health … Continue reading →

Stages of Dementia – Part I

When you read about dementia you learn that the disease presents itself in stages. The literature seems to describe six stages, seven if you think of stage one as the “normal” range in which most of us function. I am reconstructing these stages, attempting to understand the progression of the disease in our family. In … Continue reading →

Technology and Senior Adults

Both of my parents love their computers.  They use e-mail,  the web, or simply pen their thoughts.  My mother is a cracker-jack  e-mail user, communicating with various political, church, and personal lists. My father, I think, would really enjoy a smart phone because of the easy access to resources, though he would not like to … Continue reading →

How Dementia Creeps into a Life

You don’t recognize dementia for a long time. In fact, why would anyone want to recognize this disease in a much loved parent? In retrospect, the dementia first came into our family several years ago. A stroke made the symptoms worse. We noticed clothes not being hung up, keys being lost, a concern about valuables … Continue reading →

Phone Calls that Take Advantage

More than once a week my telephone rings and when I pick up an urgent recorded voice tells me that time is running out to make important and needed changes on my credit card (push #1 for assistance) or my car warranty.   At other times I hear about the best deal for my mortgage (if … Continue reading →

Exercise and Aging

I constantly worry about exercise, and I have observed first hand how much and how fast change occurs when an individual stops exercising. One of our family members moved to our area to be closer to us.  At her old home, even at age 90, she probably walked more than a mile a day. She … Continue reading →

How We Speak to Seniors

I’d love to know how many seniors are truly hard of hearing. I’ll bet the percentage is higher than the general population, but not that high. I ask this question because I’ve discovered that when people speak to seniors — in clinics, at hospitals, in stores, at the library, but especially in medical settings — … Continue reading →